One of the features of seasonal jobs is that life can switch rhythmically and drastically at the same time. What they don’t tell you is that the switch may take more time to process.

Now that I’m a couple of months out of basketball season, my vision is clearing and my body is settling. I’m learning again, as I do every spring, what it means to do life when my schedule allows for more flexibility and spontaneity.

One of the biggest things I noticed this spring was the gap I’d allowed to form between myself and other people. As anyone in athletics will know, the end of another season only amps up the energy and toll it takes. Any game could be the last. Tensions rise, and it takes extra care to prepare a team for competition and further the run.

In the attempt to conserve what precious energy I have left toward the end of season, I begin to cut back on extraneous events and communication. This is my default under stress. I want to tackle what is in front of me with all my might, so I cut off those things that appear distracting or unnecessary to “survival”.

A chief problem with this approach is that it risks putting people in the “distraction” category. I notice my relationships waning as the frequency with which I see people drops. I don’t want to put any more out – headspace, reach for communication, and time spent at events all cost me something – but then I wonder why my spirit feels sucked dry.

This struggle became more apparent as I interacted with friends who had not navigated this transition with me until this year. I had one friend in particular who thought I had changed. With hindsight, I see she was right; what she didn’t know was that this was part of a bigger pattern for me. Throw in that I wasn’t talking to many people outside of work and my family, and this gave fresh ground to grow pain and frustration. Imagine how life could’ve gone differently if I’d shared how I felt, discussed the decisions I made, and welcomed my friends into my world!

So I spent time after basketball season finding my weakened connections and bridging gaps, communicating, showing up for people, and sharing more of myself. I needed rest, yes, but sometimes rest came in the form of encouragement from others and shared joy. The holes in my schedule absorbed friends, family, and fun as well as quiet time. The markings on my calendar scared me at first glance, and it took a while to find normal again, but eventually I moved into a healthier pattern of interaction. The return felt deeper than it had in months.

Because the truth is, sometimes I have to put out first in order to receive.

“Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.”  – Luke 6:38

Bible verses are taken from the New International Version (NIV).